Something clicks in Osomatsu’s mind, and he gets a sly smile on his face. “Well, well, well! You and I are known to be pretty powerful, aren’t we, my man? It could be both!” Let’s get that product placement more clearly visible. “Grab a Canta if you can-taaa.”

“Oh, absolutely. Like, it’s about time, I’m used to being first? But I guess the anticipation made me seem all that much better, right?” He snickers at the doodle, making sure the stream can see it. “Look at this masterpiece. I’m framing this shit, don’t you dare think I’m kidding.”

“Anon, this may be the purest thing my fans have asked me to do all day. I gotchoo, buddy.” It’s overdone, a loud ‘mwah!’ accompanied by a full on swing of his arm that makes the chair spin. “I have maybe like five pure fans, congratulations, me! Thank you, me.” Don’t get him wrong, he adores the pervs. He has more than a screencap’s worth of that to answer.

“Dude, it’s already a celebration! All we have to do is keep it rolling a little longer!” He snickers, “I mean, it helps that I got delayed a day, right?” This little frick is acknowledging that I messed up, how dare he.

Osomatsu frowns. “But isn’t the point of them being that they come and go really fast? I mean, like, I thought the classic ones came and went too fast, now they’re tired after like a week? I guess I’ll go with an enduring classic or something and say either Rickrolling or the ‘you’re fucking dead, kiddo’ monologue.”

“Not after the vending machine incident in April. Sometimes, if you listen in the hallway at night, you can still hear the janitors muttering to themselves, wondering how that much blood got under there. Long story short, I’ve broken my nose in way more entertaining ways. Also, Big Boss?“ He hums in contemplation before grinning. "I can dig it.”

“Oh, you have no idea. I mean, everyone looks up to me. Like, actually everyone. The pressure’s intense, y’know?” He finishes off a bottle of Canta and burps. Yup, it’s tricky.

((thank you! 🍀 You guys are so sweet to me omg))